today was awful. i had a panic attack and he wasn't even there. it wasn't him. it was his grandma. this is getting ridiculous. this is so unbelievably hard for me. i can't control myself anymore.
i'm colleen. i sometimes think i have my life planned out, when really i don't at all. i can be full of myself, hate myself, and love myself all within a day. i hide my emotions, unless it's pure joy. i don't understand why people enjoy talking to me because, quite frankly, i'm not very interesting.
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